I Want That Feeling Again
A couple weeks ago I was talking with a friend who was leaving her job. It was a good job with a good employer but it was time to move on. I spoke with her as she was navigating the decision making process and then again on her last day.
Leaving a job – a real career-type job – is not as easy as it sounds. I know from experience. But I was happy (and a little relieved) at her response – “I feel so happy and free”, was her proclamation and in that moment so was I.
I had worked for that same employer for over 13 years, a lifetime ago it now seems. On my last day I met a friend for lunch. I had completed the ‘administrative check-out’ process (code for returning laptops and signing disclosure agreements, and other HR related activities) in the morning and by mid day I was free.
I arrived at our destination early and sat outside. It was unseasonably warm for a January 12th (circa 2009). I laughed out loud when it struck me. I was now unemployed. I was absolutely free and un-tethered and it was an amazing feeling.
Sure I could have been terrified and I understand where under other circumstances I would be. But I had taken care of my business and had a decent buyout which afforded me a comfortable runway.
In that moment, I felt about as free as I ever have as an adult.
So when my friend made her proclamation of freedom, it resonated well with me. More than a hopeful thought or wish, it awoke an echo from within.
Now, I have my feet planted firmly in reality and I do enjoy my current job and expect to be happy along this path for some time to come, but I’m also capable of carrying a dream.
And more than just about anything else, my dream is to experience that feeling of freedom again. Not when I’m a 75 year old retiree and free to do whatever is left that I’m capable of doing, but while I’m still young enough to know that I’m not yet finished, while I’m still capable of starting now what I’ve been placed here to do.
The last time I had that feeling, I knew I had a limited window to exercise it and soon thereafter this site was birthed. BANG or whimper is still being decided I suppose. But while this site has not afforded me an endless runway, it has elevated my line of sight and allowed me to expand my vision and dream for a new reality.
The next time I feel that sense of freedom, I want it to be without constraint and I’m increasingly led to believe that the budgeting and personal accountability and goal setting and introspection I espouse in this forum are somehow both the path to and message of that dream. Perhaps my membership will soar and publishers will knock down my door with huge book advances or perhaps I’ll continue modestly crafting content and eliminating debt until I can transition into another career… to become say, a high school teacher with a homemade curriculum and permission to coach a little football on the side.
Who really knows what lies around the next bend, but I know a dream for freedom has stirred within me and I look forward to figuring out how to unleash it.
If this message resonates with you, I ask that you consider sharing this article (and site) with someone. Who knows, YOU might be the tipping point in helping unleash the growth potential of this site, which in turn could help me set my dream free!
Site article is sponsored by Dental Assistant School